Written as part of a Christmas Instagram challenge for the twelve days of Christmas, this very HSA Christmas is a unique series set in no particular time within the series; written simply for some festive cheer.
“I can’t believe you still haven’t told him,” Erika giggled into her coffee cup.
“Could you do it?” Sticks spluttered incredulously. He gestured in front of them to where Bender was a few impatient minutes away from rugby tackling screaming children out of the way to get to the front of the line to see Father Christmas.
Erika viewed Bender bouncing on his toes, a piece of paper folded in his hand. He had been talking about going to visit Santa Claus for the past fortnight; ever since the festive grotto had been erected in the centre of the shopping mall. He was positively bursting with excitement that Saturday afternoon.
How could they ruin this moment for him? Who cared if he still believed in Santa? Who was it hurting?
With a shake of her head, Erika snorted into her cup and took another long indulgent sip.
“Exactly,” Sticks grunted. “I love him too much to break his heart.
“Awww.” Erika grinned, nudging him playfully.
“Shut it, right,” Sticks grumbled.
“I think it’s sweet,” Erika sang. “What’s on the paper?”
“His list,” Sticks spoke so quietly, she thought she’d misheard him.
It was impossible to hear anything over the noise of impatient children, grumpy parents, the hubbub of the mall and the loud Christmas music being piped throughout. Kelly Clarkson’s Underneath the Tree seemed even louder than the last song. Erika cringed.
“His what?” she asked.
“His list,” Sticks said clearly this time.
“His list?”
“His Christmas list, Erika.”
“Ohhh!” she beamed. “Oh, my heart.” She placed a gloved hand over her chest.
Sticks shook his head with a stifled smile. “He’s been working on it since August.”
“What’s on it?”
“A girlfriend?” Sticks chuckled.
Erika elbowed him lightly as they sniggered.
“No, seriously. Top of his list. Get laid.”
“He hasn’t,” Erika gasped, glancing to the front of the queue where a large red-cladded man sat on a gold throne, flanked by two overgrown elves. She wondered what this fake-bearded man would do when Bender reached him. “Seriously?”
“No, it actually says – find true love.”
Erika touched her chest again where her heart fluttered for her sweet friend. “Oh, he’s a dear.”
“Yeah, poor guy. Still chasing Sarah Hardcastle.”
“Good luck,” Erika grunted, though kept her opinions of their peer to herself.
As the two fell into a comfortable silence, shuffling slowly up the queue, her eyes drifted to the front once again. Her focus fell upon the elves; one elf, in particular, looked somewhat familiar. Before she could get a better look, she felt the back of her boot being stamped upon. With a wince, she swung around to see a grumpy child with snot running out of one nostril, having a tantrum. She looked to the parents who seemed more interested in their phones to notice. With a huff, Erika turned back to the front and found that familiar elf again.
And all at once, she realised who it was.
“Oh my god,” Erika gaped.
“What?” Sticks said, eyes down on his own phone.
“Look,” she said. When he didn’t move, she elbowed him in the ribs again.
“Ow! What the fuck?” Sticks yelped.
“Look!” Erika hissed, pointing to the front of the queue and at the elf on the right hand side of the fat Santa.
Sticks’s eyes narrowed but very quickly, he too recognised the blonde elf standing in a too tighter green outfit with candy-cane tights and a skirt that barely covered her large behind. On top of her head was a little green hat to complete her outfit. And on her face, Anna wore her famous furious expression.
“Oh yes,” Sticks grinned. “Oh yesss.”
“Phone. Now. Photo,” Erika demanded.
They needed evidence. They needed to make sure Anna never forgot the year she was one of Santa’s elves.
Sticks snapped a photo on his phone and sent it to everyone they knew. By the time they reached the front of the queue, the photo had no doubt reached all of their friends, and as they came to a halt, Erika and Sticks grinning from ear to ear, Anna looked up from the Polaroid camera in her grasp and noticed them.
“Oh for fuck’s sake.”
“Best. Christmas. Ever,” Sticks declared, much to Erika’s amusement.
Anna, on the other hand, was positively seething.
“Babes?” Bender spoke up.
In those hilarious minutes, Erika and Sticks had almost forgotten all about their friend, who looked from a confused Santa to a furious Anna.
“You work for da big man, now?” Bender beamed. “Think you can put in a good word for me?”
Anna hesitated, looking once again to Sticks and Erika. While they stifled their sniggers, they also beseeched with her to keep up this charade. Bender still believed in Santa Claus; would she ruin that for him out of spite?
Folding her arms, she tapped the toe of her green felt shoe on the wooden platform she stood upon by the mall Santa’s side. “Are you bribing me, Bender? Because that will get you on the Naughty List, you know,” Anna said, her fierce expression softening as Bender snickered.
“I wouldn’t mind being on your Naughty List, Anna, babes.” With a wink, their friend turned his attention to the Father Christmas who had watched the exchange with bemused eyes. “Santa, afternoon, I’m gonna need ten mins max – it’s a long list this year.” And without another word, Bender took a seat on Santa’s knee, the poor man almost collapsing under Bender’s teenage weight.
A very HSA Christmas Copyright © 2020 Jodie May Mullen